Prime Life = Prime Results

ENVY

 

The nest of envy is located in the ego of a human being. With ego, we usually mean a kind of mechanism, assigned to keep the person together, to preserve the self as whole. Person comes from the Greek word persona and means the masks that were used in front of the face in antique Greek theatrical performances. Ego doesn’t emerge before we need to use our person in relation to other people. If you are alone on a desert island, your ego doesn’t really have any significance.

 

The ego wants to come in the way of growth, and in many cases some kind of envy is in question. Envy is born, when self-appreciation is on a very low level. Envy is a problem related to self-esteem. It causes ill-disposed feelings towards others when they are better and more successful. When envious, a human being protects itself of wounds that they feel their self-esteem is suffering. When a person is envious, they project their own mistakes and deficiency on another person. An envious person may for example moralize strongly in order to cover their own urges and passions.

 

Defense is psychologically healthy per se, because a human being has to protect their life and inmost. We probably need a bit of positive envy to stay alive. Positive envy gets us motivated and makes us work for some goal. Negative envy, which in turn is greedy and exploiting, is a completely different matter. It goes so far, that the person is prepared to sacrifice something of their own good, in order to harm the other. Envy prevents learning, because we don’t want to accept the good, that someone else has to offer.

 

The goal of envy is to destroy the good that someone else owns. Envy only needs a bunch of presumptions, that we make ourselves believe are true. Excessive gossiping and unhealthy curiosity are signs of negative envy. The need to get to dig in someone else’s life and secretly enjoy their failures and weaknesses sells well. Just look at the circulation of gossip magazines. This kind should not be confused with normal curiosity, which is a natural mechanism in the human being. Healthy curiosity is needed, to learn new things constantly.

 

Envy is a reflection of poor self-esteem. It causes addiction and helplessness. The more envy there is in a work community, the more helpless people are. If you often feel negative envy, I recommend that you stop for a moment. If you surreptitiously notice that you really wish for harm for the person, you better start enhancing your self-esteem. Instead of asking yourself, what new reasons you could find to cherish your envy, as yourself, how you could enhance your self-esteem.

 

Start seeing yourself as a content and fair person, who allows others to succeed and live their own lives in peace. Focus your mind on growing your sense of being valued, not on feelings of unfairness. You will soon start noticing, that others don’t annoy you and cause you envy as much as before. As we remember, whenever we focus on something, it’s significance starts growing. When your concentration isn’t fixed on other people’s accomplishments, you will find a new feeling of responsibility and accountability in you. You will notice that you yourself are responsible for your life and you won’t feed the resentment with weeds of envy.